5 Things I learned about being a Youth Leader

The 5 things I learnt about being a youth leader that I wish I had learned right away.

1. Being cool is not important. I use to go to youth (or Young Life depending on the year) and try my hardest to be "cool" thinking that that was what was important to impress youth. If anything I probably scared some insecure teens away... and some extremely cool ones away too. Your job is not to look cool when dealing with teenagers (or anyone) your job is to look like Jesus. What did Jesus look like? He was loving, caring, and he would approach the outcasts when no one else would -- this was a difficult and humbling lesson for me to learn but this is the job of a youth leader. We don't have to look cool we just heave to learn to start conversations like no other! If you're reading this and thinking to yourself, "ah! I could never do that! Don't worry just keep reading".

 

Not cool, but still sitting by some youth. You're welcome

2. Being insecure is a definite no. If you are insecure, a youth will be able to tell your insecurities from across the room. Teenagers are not dumb, in fact because they spend the majority of their day with hundreds of other people they are usually quite socially aware of how people are feeling a lot of the time. Now here comes the hard realization that I learned in my second year of being a leader: if you are insecure, you're selfish. Now this is quite a strong and harsh statement to make so let me explain it better. If you go to youth and care more about what people think of you than of what they may discover of Jesus then you're putting your own needs abo another person's spiritual needs. If there is even one youth kid at youth that you don't talk to because you feel insecure about yourself, and they never end up coming back, then that means that you put your own personal needs in front of a youth's spiritual needs: selfish. Beth Moore says that "saving lives is worth losing face every time" and that's the attitude we need to have when we go to youth. It's not our job to look good it's our job to love good.

I learnt this very well because I had to ask myself a lot of times whether I became a youth leader for my own glorification or to love teens and show them God's love. Ultimately if you're a youth leader for your own glorification you will become insecure. If you're there for God's love you will have a confidence that stands alone to nothing and instead of pushing youth further away you will attract them to your personality, character, and love for God. Therefore, if you see someone at youth (or Young Life) that you've never seen before it's YOUR job to talk to them because you are the one filled with Holy Spirit strength, and they are not necessarily there yet. (Not to look down on the young at all but common they're new, give them a break!)

3. Never ever ever ever ever underestimate the power of prayer for youth kids. I can't tell you how many times I've met a youth and prayed desperately but unbelievingly that God would bring them to youth. I also can't tell you the amount of times God has come through with my prayers and EITHER brought those teens to youth and revealed himself to them OR didn't bring them to youth but after they graduated and went through a series of life events brought them to Adore anyways... pretty amazing stuff!! If you want to work for the kingdom of God you have to lift up your requests to the kingdom of God.

4. Stop comparing yourself to other youth leaders. If God created all youth leaders the same then your youth group would be done for because you would only be able to reach a certain type of student. God has placed a group of servants together for his kingdom in your youth group and something that is sometimes overlooked but NEVER should be is the teamwork that has to happen in that group of leaders ever week. The leaders you work with shouldn't be segregated, separated or divided into smaller little cliques. They should be celebrated, loved, and appreciated no matter how they fit into the group. By exemplifying these qualities with the leaders, you are instilling these qualities in the students. By having a knit group of individuals that love, care for, and pray for each other as leaders you are automatically showing the students what a healthy church environment is suppose to look like. You're doing more than creating just a Wednesday, or Thursday, or Friday event; you're creating a community that will one day grow up and take up the co-leader spots. Wouldn't it be great if they already knew how to love and care for each other because of the examples you gave?

3 very different ladies, all awesome

5. Be humble to your youth and humble to your superiors. This one really has two subcategories: (i) youth don't think you're cool when you try to tell them about all the "awesome" stuff you did when you were there age and younger, if anything you sound pompous; it's actually more important to listen to youth than it is to tell them your own personal stories. One thing about high school that will never change is that people will always try to be on top. If you're a youth leader you have the opportunity to be humble and allow these youth to be at the top of your world! Allow them to tell you stories and be excited for them or be sad with them or be utterly confused with them! Don't try to top their stories just because you have better stories than them -- of course you have better stories than them you probably have 5 years more experience than them! Get over yourself and leave those stories for your own friends. (ii) Be humble to your superiors, this may be your area director if you're a Young Life leader or your youth pastor if you're a youth leader. Either way, God has placed this person in this position for a reason and although I have struggled greatly with humility always when I'm placed underneath someone I've learnt that God has a plan for their lives, a plan for my life, and a plan for the life of the youth group. Allow your leader to lead you -- chances are God has blessed them with a heart for the mission, a vision for the future, and an ability to lead. And always remember that your leader is not blessed to have you, but you are blessed because God has given you the opportunity to work with youth. Don't let the opportunity pass you by.

Evan has always been a pretty special leader though :)